Meals for needy @ church

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Cricket

Guest
I have to admit that right now I am not feeling too Christian because I feel as if some of our congregation are going a little too far in asking for meals for a couple of weeks for different families who are supposedly in need. I received a call from a church person , who was asking for several others to donate a meal for her daughter, who just had a baby. WHY? This woman is very rich, she has her whole family to help out, and no medical difficulties that wouldn't allow her to take care of herself or baby. I am just getting tired of all this donations of meals to those who really have no reason, other than to have a free handout. I was asked a while ago to make lasagna for like 50 people, who were meeting after a funeral. the family who was involved could afford to hire a caterer for this, and I am suppose to feed 50 people and slave over a stove for hours and pay for all supplies? If they asked me to help out for really NEEDY people I would, but honestly, I am getting sick and tired of being used by non-needy people. My father-in-law died and someone at our church who handles gatherings of post-funerals called us and asked if we would like them to handle refreshments for those after the funeral. We said yes, and we never heard from them until the day of the funeral and got a hefty bill from the church pastor.The kicker was, her and her family took all leftovers home. Now, I know we said yes, and we knew there was going to be a bill, but how come these people didn't get others to donate food for our time of need? I am a volunteer helping out in the children's ministry and my husband is the head of collection and has many people under him he deals with., so it isn't that we are hard of heart, just tired of being used, and others are being treated the same as us, but I guess they are just doing "their duty" so to speak without grumping, which probably makes them holy people . Does your church do the same and make meals for just about any occasion or should we feel that maybe our church is overusing the donation staff?
 
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popcorn

Guest
I don't blame you for being ticked off! The other thing is that these people 'expect' the royal treatment.

Liz
 
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Calgon1

Guest
Unfortunately Cricket, there are many who talk the talk, but don't have the slightest idea how to walk the walk. Even if no one else knows you're on the right path, you'll know and so will God.

There's a saying that, "It's not the destination, but the journey." Well, I disagree. I believe it can be both. Enjoy life and keep on doing the right thing.
 
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Cricket

Guest
You are so right Calgon!

Duskbat...I am not talking about big feasts at a church or temple, we have lots of those , too. This is strictly donations of food to those in need. I guess what I am saying is that if you overuse this wonderful feature of giving and give to those who can handle it on their own with no problem,then you are abusing this priviledge of taking. At some point, the donation staff will be overburdened with requests that really shouldn't be satisifed in the first place.

My husband reminds me that we are doing a good deed, but I have always admitted I have a little bad in me and have a somewhat sarcastic side of me that maybe I need to work on. I need to look at the good side of this and then I can be like my hubby!
 
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Donna - dsw

Guest
You need to speak with those that you feel are taking advantage of this program. There are users everywhere - - but they can only use if you allow it.

You have a valid point and it sounds like your program needs to be reviewed - if nothing else - they need to know your view!

Good Luck - but must agree - - you need to please God and yourself and not everyone else.
 
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Corky

Guest
I agree with you, you are being taken advantage of, and only you can allow it to continue, or not. Sounds like your system for food donations is broken and needs to be revisited. I would call a meeting and maybe go over the Wishes of the Church again. Not the wishes of the people handling this so called Service, but the wishes of the Church.

Also, you mentioned that when your father-in-law died and the church provided refreshments that you were sent a bill. Are these "needy" people, such as the woman with the new baby, being sent a bill as well or is it handled differently? Just curious if this is a "business" the church has decided to do and they are making some sort of profit off of it.

Good luck and I know it hurts you to see this happen. Maybe your job is to take the reins and get it fixed. :) =hugs
 
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MARIPOSA

Guest
Hi there Cricket. You are bringing up a vey sore spot in many of our organizations. Whenever some folks feel that they SHOULD be giving to or doing something for someone or other, they often assume that others feel the same way. God gives each of us a nudge when He wants us to do something. If He isn't poking at you to join a specific 'offering of love' then wait until a situation comes up that you feel very strongly about contributing to. Maybe you can rehearse an assertive phrase that you could use in the future, such as "I'm sorry, I don't feel that these people need my help as much as some others that I know of."
or more to the point "I'm sorry, but I don't feel the Lord leading me to give in this way." no other explanation is needed. Then you use those whispered urges that you do receive from the Good Lord to help those that HE shows you are truly in need of HIS blessings (in the form of something created or shared by you to show His great compassion and mercy).

This reminds me of a friend who was a pastor's daughter. when she had her own family She and her husband both remained very active in her Dad's church. One day she 'considered her household' and decided that they had been spending way too much time being involved in 'church activities'and her family was suffering from lack of private times together and specifically "Mom time". To the amazement of the whole congregation, this family of 5 quit coming to the Wednesday night services and had their own study time together at home. Then my friend resigned as president of the Women's Mission organization and organist on sunday morning. The Dad quit teaching a Men's Sunday School class and the whole family began a new tradition of finally sitting together during church and then going to lunch afterwards. They still attended every Sunday morning and evening service and the family remained as faithful to the Lord as ever, but redirected their time and energies into building better family ties and creating more memories together, just like the Lord showed her that her priority was supposed to be when the children are young.

Hugs to you cricket, and you do what your heart tells you to do kiddo and don't aplogize if it is different from what other's expect from you.
Mariposa
 
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Cricket

Guest
No it is not a business and those times that I saw donations coming in, it was food that a lot of people donated from the congregation, so no there was no bill sent to them. I have decided that since my heart is not in this I will be retiring from the nursery children's program. I do feel being treated unfairly by a click of people, who basically run the church is not what I want. They can keep on running the church and I will do other volunteer work elsewhere. We recently have been talking about joining another church that we have attended a few times for one reason or other and we really enjoyed it.
 
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Cricket

Guest
mariposa...thank you for your support as i havn't felt it in my heart to give with love. I have also felt guilty feeling this way, as God does want us to give . You make total sense and I certainly have taken it all in.
 
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